30 days. Wow in so many ways our first month home has gone in a blink. In others it seems like forever that we were in New Zealand excited to come home. People ask me “I bet it was a culture shock going to Nz” My response is actually its been more of a culture shock coming back home. Its almost like we need to find our place again…in the town we literally grew up in. Everything seems so different, we know its not the place that has changed but us. We are not the same people with the same goals and dreams in life any more. God has opened our eyes to so much more and I know its not even a sliver of what’s to come. Pretty much not a piece of our lives was untouched by what happened. God seems to work like that, when he desires change He means business. I think what I’ve taken away the most and its very hard to narrow it down, is where does my identity lie? We say we are a child of The King but is that how it plays out day to day? Not for me it wasn’t. I was so wrapped up in my relationships with people, trying to help as many as I could. If a relationship had troubles it bothered me so much. Why? My identity was in that. Now I’m still a human, a woman with feelings and hang ups, but I see that if so and so doesn’t like me or gets mad or whatever the case may be, I can rest in knowing that I’m His daughter and He radically loves me. Its ok. No matter how hard we try we get wrapped up in the materials in life, our home , our gadgets, our STUFF. Again He has opened our eyes to this. I will say living in a 500 square feet flat with five people and no kitchen makes you forget about the small stuff. We were so deliriously happy! The first time I walked in I was like “um yeah, where the heck is the rest of this place…I’m a gonna kill someone if I have to live this cramped” It took a few weeks to really reset my priorities and in the end our family grew super tight. I guess again I learned my identity is not in my stuff, its easy to say, easy to judge but a lot harder to live out. I’m working this all out. Our identity should be “God of ALL loves me” Thee end. Nothing more to say. I can conquer this world if I get that, really get that into my soul.
So a few months before we left to go home we both felt God say do not work for the first 30 days when you get back…I want to blow you away with my blessings. So that’s what we have done. At first when we were living with someone, its ok. A few people gave us some money to fill our gas tank and what not. Our boys had an amazing Christmas. We saw a ton of blessings. Then came the house. We moved in a week ago and have been very busy remodelling for the last two weeks. WE LOVE IT! God has totally blessed us in So many ways with this house….you wouldn’t believe it if I told you. So we moved in and had literally no money, BUT someone had given us a gift card to Cub so we got a few groceries…not a lot but it was a start and we were so thankful! Then a few days later someone came to our house and FILLED our cupboards. Like went shopping and dropped off ten bags of food. Samm and I were speechless. He is so faithful and such a good God. We sat and thanked Him for a long time. What is so so cool is that Eli and Max totally get it. Eli said “ mom we had no food and now we have lots…God is taking care of us Mom!”
So its been a month. Back to work. Well we asked God to open or close the door with Samms old job that we assumed he would be going back to. Well He closed the door…shut. So we are praying in different things knowing in the midst He is faithful and He is our provider. I encourage you to believe in Him for something Big! I mean really if we believe He died and came back to life, how much easier to believe Him for something like your marriage or your bills. Puts it into perspective doesn’t it? Believe that He is good , Believe that He has your back, Believe that He knows you intimately.
Thank you all for being there, praying, giving and stretching your own faith muscles in your own lives!
He gets ALL the glory.
Ps we are having an Open house on February 7th @6:30 to share with you all what happened in Nz. You should come…its going to be Great!!!!